Showing posts with label NASA. Show all posts
Showing posts with label NASA. Show all posts

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Today's Jokes by Wendel Potter

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For years, Wendel Potter has brought his entertaining blend of humor, nostalgia, and American values to conventions, banquets, churches, and corporate functions.  If you would like to book Wendel to speak at your next event, contact him by email:  wendelspeaks@yahoo.com

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Willie Nelson has cut off his braids.  A celebrity hair cut hasn't caused this much of a stir since that episode of Bonanza when Hop Sing got his pigtail caught in the Cartwrights' Cuisinart.


According to Willie, he cut his hair because it was getting in his way.  He was mistaking his braids for hemp and trying to smoke them.


NASA's Atlantis program has come to an end.  The space shuttle has landed in Florida where it will be placed in a retirement community with a lot of other nice retired shuttles.


Federal forecasters are predicting a fierce hurricane season this year.  Up to 23 storms could hit the Gulf of Mexico.  They've already picked out a name for the first one:  Hurricane BP.


The house that inspired the book and movie, The Amityville Horror, is up for sale.  The asking price is 1.15 million dollars but they'll take a lower offer if you bring in a psychic who proves the house is still haunted.  That's what you call reaching a happy medium.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Today's Jokes for Tuesday, March 30, 2010

NASA scientists have been asked to help figure out what caused the sudden acceleration in Toyota vehicles.  Once they've discovered the secret, NASA will be able to get to the moon in half the time.


Imagine...NASA studying motor vehicles.  Maybe next they can take their knowledge of moon craters and figure out how to fill the potholes in my street. 




The Republican National Committee wants to know why $2000 from its campaign account was spent at an erotic nightclub in West Hollywood.  An RNC staffer said he took a group of donors to the club when he heard it had an S&M theme...he thought it had something to do with the Republican Whip.




That sex-themed nightclub in West Hollywood is now on Sarah Palin's Facebook Page where she  shows a map of Republican Congressional Districts and she's drawn a circle around the nightclub with a note: You Are Here.


In Germany, the Roman Catholic Church has opened a hotline for victims of child abuse.  When they answer the phone, you say, "Bless me, Father, for you have sinned."

Friday, October 9, 2009

Today's Jokes

NASA has landed a spacecraft on the Moon. The mission is to see if they can find water. Apparently, our government wants to prove its theory that rain actually comes from the Moon.


President Barack Obama is the winner of the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize. He won it for his international diplomacy, and for his stoic refusal to bitch-slap Joe Wilson.


According to an ex-Late Show staffer, David Letterman had a secret bedroom above the Ed Sullivan Theater. Sounds like the other really big shoe has dropped.