Today's Jokes by Wendel Potter

Wyoming leads the country in the use of chewing tobacco.  There's a reason for that.  Out in Wyoming, you can spit farther.


West Virginia came in second in the nation's consumption of chewing tobacco.  If you spit anywhere in West Virginia, chances are good you'll hit your cousin.





Minnesota's U.S. representative Michele Bachman is claiming that President Obama's upcoming trip to India is going to cost us $200,000,000  a day.  By the way, Michele Bachman has a new stress management video.  She teaches you to relax and focus on something calm and serene, like a quiet ocean without so much as a ripple.  It's a DVD of her brain wave activity.


Daylight Saving Time is over this weekend.  Saturday night we set our clocks back, which means Charlie Sheen has an extra hour to stay up on crack cocaine.




The failure to legalize marijuana in California didn't change anything.  Convenience store sales of munchies are just as high as ever.


Ryan O'Neal and his daughter, Tatum, will appear in their own reality TV series.  It's called, "I'll Smoke It If You Will".




Former teen idol and  Partirdge Family star David Cassidy was arrested in Florida for DUI.  I guess when a 60-year old man wearing a paisley shirt is weaving all over the road in a psychedelic bus, he's bound to attract attention.


Now that the Republicans are taking control of the House of Representatives,  Nancy Pelosi says she will run for minority leader.   In our Congress, stepping down as Speaker of the House and becoming minority leader is like the Madam of a brothel getting demoted to Chief Whore.




......and thanks for reading