Did you hear about that couple that crashed the White House dinner on Tuesday? They told the Secret Service that they heard the government was footing the bill for a big dinner, so they just assumed it was a Thanksgiving meal for the poor.
That couple that got past security and crashed the state dinner at the White House said it was all a mistake. They thought they were in the line to see New Moon.
I understand the couple that crashed the state dinner finally gave themselves away. They forgot to bow to the Indian prime minister.
On a special Thanksgiving edition of his show Thursday night, Jay Leno gave away a new car to one of his audience members. I guess since Oprah's no longer doing her "favorite things" episode, Jay figured somebody had to step up to the plate.
Roman Polanski will be allowed to return to his chalet in the Swiss Alps on Monday, where he will be under house arrest. The first thing he's going to do when he gets home is throw a party in honor of his new housekeeper's 13th birthday.
Toyota is recalling 4 million vehicles. They say the cars experience sudden bursts of acceleration. Sounds like Toyota should be in charge of our economy.
Tiger Woods was involved in a car accident yesterday. He hit his neighbors' hydrant and tree. Oh boy! The neighbors had already been complaining that Tiger's dog kept hitting the same hydrant and tree.
To get Tiger Woods' out of his SUV after the accident, his wife knocked out the back window with a golf club. That was her first hole-in-one.
The police say they don't think alcohol was a factor. Tiger had just filled up with regular unleaded.
ESPN broke into college football coverage yesterday with the news about Tiger Woods' accident. However, The Golf Channel never did break in with any football scores.
Tiger Woods' accident happened as he was leaving his house at 2:30 Friday morning. He was trying to get to the mall to buy a Zhu Zhu hamster.
About Me
- Wendel Potter
- My writing career took off in 1979 and it continues to roll. I've written comedy for Joan Rivers, Jay Leno, Rodney Dangerfield, and the Yakov Smirnoff Show. I was a weekly columnist for a Nebraska newspaper for 10 years. Several of my short stories have been published in a national magazine, Woman's World. This blog is a return to old columns dear to my heart and new essays that are currently ideas on a close horizon. I hope we can become friends.
Showing posts with label state dinner. Show all posts
Showing posts with label state dinner. Show all posts
Friday, November 27, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Today's Jokes by Wendel Potter
Last night at a state dinner, President Obama toasted the prime minister of India. Then he asked him for tech support on fixing his cell phone.
The menu at the White House state dinner last night was strictly vegetarian. It was a lot like Obama's health care plan: plenty filling, but no meat.
India's Prime Minister was assured that the menu at the state dinner would be meatless, so he was alarmed when he overhead a waiter saying that he was "serving badger". Turns out the guy just meant that he'd been assigned to Katie Couric's table.
Since India's prime minister was a special guest at the state dinner, the White House served a vegetarian menu. The prime minister seemed pleased but his limousine was spotted later driving through a McDonalds.
So the state dinner honored the prime minister of India and the menu was vegetarian. How do you like that for Thanksgiving: no turkey, wrong Indians.
Oprah Winfrey was invited to the state dinner, but couldn't make it. She's still at home pacing the floor, wondering how she's going to make it after her talk show goes off the air.
Steven Spielberg was at the dinner and he told Joe Biden that it was the Vice President and not the novel that inspired his film Jaws.
A Chinese medical expert warns that China could be facing a huge pandemic if the swine flu virus mixes with the bird flu virus. Another expert said that was virtually impossible, "Swine mixing with bird? When pigs fly."
The menu at the White House state dinner last night was strictly vegetarian. It was a lot like Obama's health care plan: plenty filling, but no meat.
India's Prime Minister was assured that the menu at the state dinner would be meatless, so he was alarmed when he overhead a waiter saying that he was "serving badger". Turns out the guy just meant that he'd been assigned to Katie Couric's table.
Since India's prime minister was a special guest at the state dinner, the White House served a vegetarian menu. The prime minister seemed pleased but his limousine was spotted later driving through a McDonalds.
So the state dinner honored the prime minister of India and the menu was vegetarian. How do you like that for Thanksgiving: no turkey, wrong Indians.
Oprah Winfrey was invited to the state dinner, but couldn't make it. She's still at home pacing the floor, wondering how she's going to make it after her talk show goes off the air.
Steven Spielberg was at the dinner and he told Joe Biden that it was the Vice President and not the novel that inspired his film Jaws.
A Chinese medical expert warns that China could be facing a huge pandemic if the swine flu virus mixes with the bird flu virus. Another expert said that was virtually impossible, "Swine mixing with bird? When pigs fly."
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