Today's Jokes by Wendel Potter

Did you hear about that couple that crashed the White House dinner on Tuesday? They told the Secret Service that they heard the government was footing the bill for a big dinner, so they just assumed it was a Thanksgiving meal for the poor.


That couple that got past security and crashed the state dinner at the White House said it was all a mistake. They thought they were in the line to see New Moon.


I understand the couple that crashed the state dinner finally gave themselves away. They forgot to bow to the Indian prime minister.



On a special Thanksgiving edition of his show Thursday night, Jay Leno gave away a new car to one of his audience members. I guess since Oprah's no longer doing her "favorite things" episode, Jay figured somebody had to step up to the plate.



Roman Polanski will be allowed to return to his chalet in the Swiss Alps on Monday, where he will be under house arrest. The first thing he's going to do when he gets home is throw a party in honor of his new housekeeper's 13th birthday.


Toyota is recalling 4 million vehicles. They say the cars experience sudden bursts of acceleration. Sounds like Toyota should be in charge of our economy.


Tiger Woods was involved in a car accident yesterday. He hit his neighbors' hydrant and tree. Oh boy! The neighbors had already been complaining that Tiger's dog kept hitting the same hydrant and tree.


To get Tiger Woods' out of his SUV after the accident, his wife knocked out the back window with a golf club. That was her first hole-in-one.


The police say they don't think alcohol was a factor. Tiger had just filled up with regular unleaded.


ESPN broke into college football coverage yesterday with the news about Tiger Woods' accident. However, The Golf Channel never did break in with any football scores.


Tiger Woods' accident happened as he was leaving his house at 2:30 Friday morning. He was trying to get to the mall to buy a Zhu Zhu hamster.