Here's a heart-warming story for a Monday: Robin Alex of Albuquerque received word that her cat Charles, was safe and sound after wandering 1300 miles from New Mexico to Chicago. Charles was discovered at Wrigley Field during a Cubs game. I don't know how he stood out in the crowd. Everyone at the Cubs game was making cat calls.
Well, last week on April 15, supporters of the Tea Party staged a Tax Day protest. Did you notice they haven't scheduled a Tax Refund Day protest?
If you haven't mailed in your Census 2010 form, you'll be paid a visit by a census taker and that will cost the government $56 a household. Here's an idea: How about paying out 56 bucks to those of us who already sent in the form and fining those who didn't?
A stretch of Interstate 44 near St. Louis has been paved with asphalt made from recycled hog manure. Now the Rams football team isn't the only thing in St. Louis that stinks.
Can you imagine paving your driveway with pig manure? When your Jewish friends came over, they'd have to park in the street.
Last week, in Connecticut, a runaway excavator owned by a construction company, knocked over trees, flattened a camper and finally smashed into a house. Wow! I didn't even know Toyota made an excavator.
About Me
- Wendel Potter
- My writing career took off in 1979 and it continues to roll. I've written comedy for Joan Rivers, Jay Leno, Rodney Dangerfield, and the Yakov Smirnoff Show. I was a weekly columnist for a Nebraska newspaper for 10 years. Several of my short stories have been published in a national magazine, Woman's World. This blog is a return to old columns dear to my heart and new essays that are currently ideas on a close horizon. I hope we can become friends.
Showing posts with label Tea Party. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tea Party. Show all posts
Monday, April 19, 2010
Friday, April 16, 2010
Today's Jokes for Friday April 16, 2010 by Wendel Potter
Yesterday all MLB players wore No. 42 on their jerseys to honor the baseball legend Jackie Robinson....or as Chad Ochocinco likes to call him, "Jackie Cuarenta y dos".
On Tuesday, in Tracy City, Tennessee, a dead man was elected mayor. Carl Geary died during the campaign, but on election day he still beat out his opponent by a wide margin of votes:
Coincidentally, services were held for Carl on Tuesday night after the polls closed. He was cremated. When the crowd that had gathered outside the funeral home saw a puff of white smoke, they shouted, "We have a mayor!"
Members of the Tracy City Tea Party Movement are upset with the election of the dead man. They demand that he produce a U.S. death certificate.
Congress has sent President Obama an 18 billion dollar jobless benefits bill that will extend unemployment payments for Americans who are out of work. Unemployed supporters of the Tea Party movement will rally in Washington today to oppose the bill, saying that it smacks of socialism, that the government has no business sticking its nose in the affairs of its jobless citizens, and that they and their families would rather go hungry than accept a dime from such outrageous spending.
They've already made a hit movie about how European airlines are dealing with the shutdown of flights caused by that volcano in Iceland. The film, which opens this weekend, is called "Kick-Ash".
And a thought for the day.....in the 1960s pop culture girls were called "birds". Guys who watched girls were called "bird watchers". Would that make them horny-thologists?
On Tuesday, in Tracy City, Tennessee, a dead man was elected mayor. Carl Geary died during the campaign, but on election day he still beat out his opponent by a wide margin of votes:
Coincidentally, services were held for Carl on Tuesday night after the polls closed. He was cremated. When the crowd that had gathered outside the funeral home saw a puff of white smoke, they shouted, "We have a mayor!"
Members of the Tracy City Tea Party Movement are upset with the election of the dead man. They demand that he produce a U.S. death certificate.
Congress has sent President Obama an 18 billion dollar jobless benefits bill that will extend unemployment payments for Americans who are out of work. Unemployed supporters of the Tea Party movement will rally in Washington today to oppose the bill, saying that it smacks of socialism, that the government has no business sticking its nose in the affairs of its jobless citizens, and that they and their families would rather go hungry than accept a dime from such outrageous spending.
They've already made a hit movie about how European airlines are dealing with the shutdown of flights caused by that volcano in Iceland. The film, which opens this weekend, is called "Kick-Ash".
And a thought for the day.....in the 1960s pop culture girls were called "birds". Guys who watched girls were called "bird watchers". Would that make them horny-thologists?
Sunday, March 28, 2010
Wendel's Jokes for Sunday, March 28th, 2010
Northern China was hit the other day by ferocious sandstorms. In the United States, we just call that "kids hitting the beach for spring break".
Well, Pope Benedict XVI celebrated Palm Sunday in St. Peter's Square amid the palm-waving crowds. The Vatican couldn't come up with a donkey for the pope to ride but that's okay. The pope's quite capable of making ass out of himself.
In Middleton, Wisconsin, the Benedictine nuns have built a solar-powered monastery. They wanted to show the Pope that Catholics are tired of being kept in the dark.
Sarah Palin appeared at a Tea Party rally in Nevada where she told her audience that Senator Harry Reid has some explaining to do over his vote for Health Reform. Using gambling rhetoric, Palin said that Reid needs to be told that the future of this country " is not a crapshoot". No, crapshoot is what you get whenever Sarah Palin opens her mouth.
The Tea Party rally in Nevada is being billed as a conservative Woodstock. And it looks like they've already been into the brown acid.
The full slate of Major League regular season baseball games get underway the day after Easter. That means the Cubs still have over a week to stay tied for first place.
Well, Pope Benedict XVI celebrated Palm Sunday in St. Peter's Square amid the palm-waving crowds. The Vatican couldn't come up with a donkey for the pope to ride but that's okay. The pope's quite capable of making ass out of himself.
In Middleton, Wisconsin, the Benedictine nuns have built a solar-powered monastery. They wanted to show the Pope that Catholics are tired of being kept in the dark.
Sarah Palin appeared at a Tea Party rally in Nevada where she told her audience that Senator Harry Reid has some explaining to do over his vote for Health Reform. Using gambling rhetoric, Palin said that Reid needs to be told that the future of this country " is not a crapshoot". No, crapshoot is what you get whenever Sarah Palin opens her mouth.
The Tea Party rally in Nevada is being billed as a conservative Woodstock. And it looks like they've already been into the brown acid.
The full slate of Major League regular season baseball games get underway the day after Easter. That means the Cubs still have over a week to stay tied for first place.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)