Monday, March 8, 2010

Today's Jokes for Monday, March 8th by Wendel Potter

Last evening, Barbara Walters hosted her final Oscar Night interviews, a program that's preceded the Academy Awards show on ABC since 1981.   Jay Leno called Barbara and said to tell ABC that she would return next year only if she could have a later time slot and they bump the Oscars back half an hour.


Sandra Bullock won the Oscar for Best Actress for The Blind Side.  It was no surprise, but Sandra's stunt driver husband, Jesse James, was there to prepare her for the crash in case she got blind sided by Meryl Streep.


Hilary Swank showed up at the Academy Awards in what was probably the most revealing gown at the Oscars.  In her last film, Hilary portrayed Amelia Earhart, the famous aviator who disappeared.  Last night, there was nothing about Hilary that disappeared.


After Penelope Cruz announced the winner for Best Supporting Actor, the Academy decided to add a new category:  Best Foreign Language Presenter.


Mary Josephine Ray of New Hampshire has passed away at the age of 114 years, 294 days.  She was the oldest living person in the United States.  Now she's not.



Six New Jersey women are in the hospital after receiving buttocks-enhancement injections that contained a non-medical grade of silicone that's used to caulk bathtubs.  Now, after they bathe, they're left with a ring around their asses.


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