Monday, November 4, 2013

Today's Jokes by Wendel Potter



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Well, we're in to November and Thanksgiving is just around the corner.  President Obama will once again choose a turkey to pardon.  I'm guessing it will be the Obamacare website.


Turns out the movie, "The Fifth Estate" is the biggest film disaster of 2013.   See, this is the difference between a movie and the Affordable Health Care website.  A movie is a flop when there's no lines and no waiting.


Daylight Saving Time came to an end on Sunday.  Apparently, President Obama turned back the clock on his health care website to 1995.


This was the weekend when Eveready made its semiannual killing on those little 9 volt smoke alarm batteries.


A medical study says that sugary beverages can lead to crippling rheumatoid arthritis....which means that eventually people who drink sugary beverages will be drinking them through a straw.


Actress Michelle Pfeiffer says that when she was 20 years old, she belonged to a cult that believed that sunlight is all you need to survive.  Michelle said she finally left the cult after she nearly died during a solar eclipse.


Justin Bieber stormed off a stage in Brazil after being hit in the head with a bottle.  It turns out it was his mother who threw the bottle.  She wasn't trying to hit her son, she was just trying to get him to take his 8 p.m. feeding.


In Germany, they've discovered 1500 works of art, including masterpieces by Picasso and Matisse,  that were confiscated and hidden by the Nazis during World War II.  The artwork is in pretty good condition except for the fact that the humans in all the paintings have little square moustaches.


.....thanks for reading!



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